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Ceremonies, Vows & Verses
Religious Ceremonies
Non Religious Ceremonies
Rose Ceremony
Alternative Vows
Non-denominational
Vows
Medieval
Standard Christian
Wedding Ceremony
(This non-denomination Christian ceremony takes about 9-17 minutes,
depending upon whether you have unity candles, Rose ceremony etc.
You may make changes if you wish.)
We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life's greatest
moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and
to add our best wishes to the words which shall unite _______________________
and ______________________ in marriage.
Should there be anyone who has cause why this couple should not
be united in marriage, they must speak now or forever hold their
peace.
(If the bride is escorted forward)
Who is it that brings this woman to this man?
(The father, children, relative etc. may give the bride away. He/they
answer "I do", "I do on behalf of her family and
friends" etc., This person then steps back and the groom takes
the bride's hand.)
____________________and _______________________ , life is given
to each of us as individuals, and yet we must learn to live together.
Love is given to us by our family or by our friends. We learn to
love by being loved. Learning to love and living together is one
of the greatest challenges of life - and is the shared goal of a
married life.
VOWS
(Vows used unless other vows are wished. See Alternative Vows.
You may change the vows as you wish or write your own vows.)
(Groom) ___________________, do you take ________________ to he
your Wife? ("I do") Do you promise to love, honor, cherish
and protect her, forsaking all others and holding only unto her?
("I do")
(Bride_____________________, do you take __________________ to
be your Husband? ("I do") Do you promise to love, honor,
cherish and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only unto
him? ("I do")
(If rings are exchanged each does so before repeating the following
vows - unless you wish other vows or do not wish to repeat)
Repeated Vows & Wedding Rings
"Wedding rings are an outward and visible sign of an inward
spiritual grace and the unbroken circle of love, signifying to all
the union of this man and this woman in marriage."
(Groom) I _____________, take thee , ________________ to be my
Wife- 7o have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer
or for poorer, and I promise my love to you forevermore.
(Bride) I _________________ , take thee _______________, to be
my Husband. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for
richer or for poorer, and I promise My love to you forevermore.
(If there are children of either couple, sometimes couples will
give a ring or small gift such as a necklace or ring to the child
and say a short statement that they also are now part of the new
family. I believe it very important to mention children's names
in the ceremony, If you have minor children coming into the marriage,
please provide their names so I will mention them as is appropriate.)
____________________________ and ___________________________ as
the two of you come into this marriage uniting you as husband and
wife, and as you this day affirm your faith and love for one another,
I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special
and unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and
suggestions of one another. Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges,
and live each day that you may share it together - as from this
day forward you shall be each other's home, comfort and refuge,
your marriage strengthened by your love and respect for each other.
Corinthians
"A marriage ceremony represents one of life's greatest commitments.
But it also is a declaration of love. I wish to read to you what
Paul wrote of love in a letter to the Corinthians. I believe it
is a true model of love and it is a model of love I hope you pursue
in your marriage:
"Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious,
never boastful or proud.
Love is never haughty or selfish or rude.
Love does not demand it's own way. Love is not irritable or touchy.
Love does not hold grudges and will hardly notice when others do
it wrong.
Love is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth
wins out.
If you love someone, you will be loyal to them no matter what the
costs. You will always believe in them, always expect the best in
them, and will always stand your ground in defending them."
PRAYER
(PRAYER if desired. You may alter this or replace it with another.
Some couples will ask a family member to say a prayer.)
Dear Heavenly Father, (or "Oh Lord") our hearts are filled
with great happiness on________________ and ____________________'s
wedding day, as they come before You pledging their hearts and lives
to one another. Grant that they may ever be true and loving, living
together in such a way as to never bring shame or heartbreak into
their marriage. Temper their hearts with kindness and understanding,
rid them of all pretense or jealousy. Help them to remember to be
each other's sweetheart, helpmate, best friend and guide, so that
together they may meet the cares and problems of life more bravely.
And with the passage of time, may they find great contentment in
the rich joy of senior companionship. May the home they are creating
today truly be a place of love and harmony, where Your Spirit is
always present. Bless this marriage we pray and walk beside ____________
and ________________ throughout all of their lives together. We
ask these things in Jesus name; Amen
UNITY CANDLES
(If unity candles are used - optional. If the Rose Ceremony is
used, it is placed after the unity candle ceremony or in place of
it.)
____________________ and _____________________, the two separate
candles symbolize your separate lives, separate families and separate
sets of friends. I ask that each of you take on of the lit candles
and that together you light the center candle.
The individual candles represent your lives before today. Lighting
the center candle represents that your two lives are now joined
to one light, and represents the joining together of your two families
and sets of friends to one.
(You can also involve children in the unity candle ceremony - click
here)
MUSIC
(For couples who are adding music to the ceremony, it is usually
placed either here or after the vows are repeated earlier.)
ROSE CEREMONY: You may add the Rose Ceremony at this point if you
wish)
________________________ and _________________________, in so much
as the two of you have agreed to live together in Holy Matrimony,
have promised your love for each other by these vows, the joining
of your hands and the giving of these rings, I now declare you to
be Husband and Wife.
Whom God hath joined together, let no one put asunder.
(Some couples add the benediction: "May the Lord bless you
and keep you. May the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious
unto you. May the Lord lift up his countenance unto to you, and
give you peace.")
Congratulations, you may kiss your bride.
It is my privilege to present to you Mr. & Mr. __________________________
(If a large gathering, after the wedding party has exited, I will
thank all for coming on your behalf and make any reception announcements
that you wish.)
Traditional Christian
Ceremony
(This is a non-denomination, traditional Christian Ceremony that
you may modify or add to. I conduct the ceremony in the legal capacity
as an ordained Christian minister.)
We are gathered here today in the sight of God and angels, and
the presence of friends and loved ones, to celebrate one of life's
greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of
love, and to add our best wishes and blessings to the words which
shall unite _____________and________________ in holy matrimony
Marriage is a most honorable estate, created and Instituted by
God, signifying unto us the mystical union, which also exists between
Christ and the Church; so too may this marriage be adorned by true
and abiding love.
Should there be anyone who has cause why this couple should not
be united in marriage, they must speak now or forever hold their
peace. (You may delete this if you wish)
(If bride is escorted forward)
Who is it that brings this woman to this man? (If the father, he
may answer "her mother and I", "her father on behalf
of the family"or simply "I do". He will place the
bride’s hand with the groom's and steps back.
______________and____________________ life is given to each of
us as individuals, and yet we must learn to live together. Love
is give to us by our family and friends. We learn to love by being
loved. Learning to love and living together is one of life's greatest
challenges and is the shared goal of a married life.
But a husband and wife should not confuse love of worldly measures
for even if worldly success is found, only love will maintain a
marriage. Mankind did not create love; love is created by God. The
measure of true love is a love both freely given and freely accepted,
just as God's love of us is unconditional and free.
Today truly is a glorious day the Lord hath made - as today both
of you are blessed with God's greatest of all gifts - the gift of
abiding love and devotion between a man and a woman. All present
here today - and those here in heart - wish both of you all the
joy, happiness and success and the world has to offer.
As you travel through life together, I caution you to remember
that the true measure of success, the true avenue to joy and peace,
is to be found within the love you hold in your hearts. I would
ask that you hold the key to your heart very tightly.
Within the Bible, nothing is of more importance that love. We are
told the crystalline and beautiful truth: "God is Love".
We are assured that "Love conquers all". It is love, which
brings you here today, the union of two hearts and two spirits.
As your lives continue to interweave as one pattern, remember that
it was love that brought you here today, it is love that will make
this a glorious union, and it is love which will cause this union
to endure.
VOWS
(You may selection other vows, pick for our different denomination
vows, or write your own)
Would you please face each other and join hands.
(Groom)___________________do you take _________________to be your
wife?
Do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect her, forsaking
all others and holding only to her forevermore?("I do")
(Bride)________________do you take_________________ to be your
Husband?
Do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him, forsaking
all others and holding only to him forevermore?("I do")
Reading from Corinthians
A marriage ceremony represents one of life's greatest commitments,
but also is a declaration of love. I wish to read to you what Paul
wrote of love in a letter to the Corinthians a long time ago. I
believe this is a true model of love, and it is a model of love
I would hope you both would pursue in your marriage:
" Though I speak with the tongues of men and angels - but
do not have love, I am only sounding brass or tinkling cymbals.
Though I have the gift of prophecy and understanding all mysteries
and all knowledge, and though I have all faith so that I could remove
mountains – but do not have love, I am nothing. Though I bestow
all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned
but do not have love, it profits me nothing.
Love endures and is kind. Love is not envious or jealous. Love
wants not itself, is not puffed up, does not behave itself unseemly,
seeks not its own, it is not easily provoked, and thinks no evil.
Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness - but in the truth.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and
endures all things. Love never fails.
Where there are prophecies, they shall fail, where there be tongues,
they shall cease, where there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.
For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when that which
is perfect is come, that which is part shall be done away with.
When I was a child I used to talk as a child, think as a child,
reason as a child. When I became an adult, I put aside childish
things. At present we see indistinctly - as in a mirror - but then
we shall see face to face. At present I know partially, then I shall
know fully, as I am fully known. So faith, hope, love remain- these
three- but the greatest of these is love.
(For more OLD& NEW TESTAMENT BIBLE VERSES RELATED TO WEDDINGS
- click here)
Vows to be Repeated
(you may change these vows or write your own)
[Groom] I,________________ take thee _________________, to be my
wife. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer
or for poorer, and I promise my love to you forevermore.
[Bride] I,___________________ take thee ________________ to be
my Husband. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for
richer or for poorer, and I promise my love to you forevermore.
Exchange of Rings
(rings are not required for a marriage ceremony)
Wedding rings are an outward and visible sign of an inward spiritual
grace, signifying to all the uniting of this man and this woman
in marriage.
(Bride and Groom will repeat these vows as they place the ring
on the other’s finger:)
"With this ring, I thee wed. In the name of the Father, and
of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen."
(If a song is being sung, it is often added at this point)
Reading from Ephesians
(Some couples delete this passage from the ceremony)
In Ephesians, the relationship between husband and wife is compared
to between Christ and the church:
" Submit yourselves one to another as the fear of God. Wives,
show reverence for your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the
husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the
church and He is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church
is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own Husbands
in everything.
Husbands, love your wife, even as Christ also loved the church,
and gave Himself for it; that He might sanctify and cleanse it with
the washing of water by the word; that He might present it to Himself
a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkles or any such thing;
but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to
love their wives as their own body; He that loves his wife loves
himself.
For no man ever yet hateth his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes
it, even as the Lord the church. For we are members of his body,
of his flesh, and of his bones.
For this cause shall man leave his father and mother, and shall
be joined unto his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This
mystery is a profound one and I am saying this as it refers to Christ
and the Church; however, let husband love his wife as himself, and
let the wife see that she respect her husband."
Charge to the Couple
______________________ and ___________________ as the two of you
come into this marriage uniting you as husband and wife, and as
you this day affirm your faith and love for one another, I would
ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special and
unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and suggestions
of one another. Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges, and live
each day that you may share it together - as from this day forward
you shall be each other's home, comfort and refuge, your marriage
strengthened by your love and respect.
PRAYER
(If there are minor children coming into the marriage, it is important
they be mentioned in the prayer - See adding children to the prayer.
Please provide their names – write the names in the side margin.)
"Dear heavenly Father (or "Oh Lord"), our hearts
are filled with great happiness on _____________ and _________________’s
wedding day, as they come before You pledging their hearts and lives
to one another. Grant that they may be ever true and loving, living
together is such a way as to never bring shame or heartbreak into
their marriage. Temper their hearts with kindness and understanding,
rid them of all pretense of jealousy. Help them to remember to be
each other's sweetheart, helpmate, friend and guide, so that together
they may meet the cares and problems of life more bravely. And with
the passage of time, may the home they are creating today, truly
be a place of love and harmony, where your spirit is ever present.
Bless this union we pray, and walk beside _________________ and
________________ throughout all their lives together. We ask these
things in Jesus name; AMEN
(Some couples will have the minister ask guests to join in the
Lord’s Prayer or it may be sung or played in tape – CD.
Other couples will ask someone else to read the prayer above or
say their own prayer.)
UNITY CANDLES
(If unity candles are used – optional – it will be at
this point in the ceremony)
"___________________ and ________________ the two lighted
candies symbolize your separate lives, your separate families and
your separate sets of friends. I ask that you each take one candle
and that together you light the center candle.
The individual candies represent your individual lives before today.
Lighting the center candle represents that your two lives are now
joined to one light, and represents the joining together of your
two families and sets of friends to one."
Rose Ceremony may be added at this point
(The Rose Ceremony is a special addition found on in
these materials. If it is used, it is added at this point in the
ceremony.)
Pronouncement as Husband & Wife
____________________ and ___________________in so much as the
two of you have agreed to live together in Matrimony, have promised
your love for each other by these vows, the giving of these rings
and the joining of your hands, I now declare you to be husband and
wife.
BENEDICTION
(may be deleted if you wish:)
May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make his face
shine upon you, and be gracious unto you. May the Lord lift up his
countenance unto you, and give you peace.
Congratulations, you may kiss your bride.
I present to you Mr. and Mrs. ____________________________.
(After the couple have exited, I will thank everyone for coming
on the Bride and Groom’ behalf and make any reception announcements
you wish.
Jewish Marriage Ceremony
(This is a full Jewish ceremony rich in the traditional spirituality
of a Jewish marriage ceremony combined with consistent romantic
language. The Benedictions or other spiritual language is in strict
accordance with the guildelines of the Central Conference of American
Rabbis. However, the wording of the ceremony does not imply officiation
by a Rabbi or Jewish officiant. This ceremony should not be used
to replace officiation by a Rabbi - but instead it is an emergency
fill-in ceremony or when a Rabbi is impossible to obtain due to
date and time.
There are subtle language choice changes allowing attendance by
non-Jewish guests without hypocracy. The ceremony uncompromisingly
declares the Bride and Groom ascribe to the faith of Israel and
that the ceremony is fully in reverence to the Jewish faith. However,
it does not declare all attending are of the Jewish faith to allow
comfortable attendance and participation by all.
The language also is altered without change to spiritual substance
to allow it to be more understandable to younger guests - such as
lessening usage of "eth" endings to words.
Also added are popular rituals found in most weddings such as the
giving away of the bride, presenting the bride and groom as "Mr."
and "Mrs". and other popular marriage ceremony rites not
contradicting to a formal and otherwise traditional Jewish marriage
ceremony. Further down this page you can find the 'breaking of the
bottle".
Note, in a Jewish ceremony, the bride stands on the man's Right
side and rings are worn on the right hand traditionally.
THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY
(Officiant motions guests to stand as the bride enters if there
is a processional)
We are gathered here today to celebrate on of life's greatest moments,
to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and to add
our best wishes to the words which shall unite ________________
and _____________ in marriage.
(If bride is escorted forward)
Who is it that brings this woman forward to this man?
("Her mother and I", "I do", "Her father".
or "I do on behalf of the family".)
_______________ and ___________, life is given to each of us as
individuals, and yet we must learn to live together. Love is given
to us by our family and friends - we learn to love by being loved.
Learning to love and living together is one of the greatest challenges
of life; and it is the shared goal of a married life.
But we also must remember that it is not mankind which created
love, but God who created love.
Blessed art thou, O Lord God, creator of all things.
(Ist marriage vows)
(Groom) Do you ____________, take _______ to be your wife? ("I
do"). Do you promise to love, cherish and protect her, whether
in good fortune or in adversity, and to seek with her a life hallowed
by the faith of Israel? ("I do")
(Bride) Do you ____________, take _______ to be your husband? ("I
do"). Do you promise to love, cherish and protect him, whether
in good fortune or in adversity, and to seek with him a life hallowed
by the faith of Israel? ("I do")
(The Benediction)
May the bride and groom now recieve the benediction -
"Blessed art Thou O Lord God, Ruler of the Universe, Creator
of Man.
"Blessed art Thou O Lord God, Ruler of the Universe, Who hast
fashioned us in Thine own image and who established marriage for
the fullfillment and perpetuation of life in accordance with Thy
holy purpose. "Blessed art Thou O Lord God, Creator of man.
"Blessed art Thou O Lord God, Ruler of the Universe, Who art
the source of all gladness and joy. Through Thy grace we attaoin
affection, companionship, love and peace. Grant that the love which
unites this man and woman my grow in abiding happiness. May their
family be ennobled through their devotion to the faith of Israel.
May there be peace in their home, quietness and confidence in their
hearts. May they be sustained by Thy comforting presense in the
midst of our people and Thy promise of salvation of all mankind.
"Blessed art Thou O Lord God, Ruler of the Universe, Who dost
unite this man and this woman in the holy joy of martrimony. Amen"
JEWISH CEREMONY WINE RITUAL
(If wine is presented to the Bridegroom and his Bride..)
"As you have shared the wine from this cup, so may you, under
God's guidance, draw contentment, confort and strength from the
cup of life. May you find life's joys heightened, it's bitterness
sweetened, and all things hallowed by true companionship and love."
(Exchange of rings)
(Groom) __________ , as you place this ring upon the finger of
__________, speak to her these vows:
" With this ring/ be thou consecrated unto me/ as my wife/
according to the law of God / and the faith of Israel."
(Bride) __________ , as you place this ring upon the finger of
__________, speak to her these vows:
" With this ring/ be thou consecrated unto me/ as my wife/
according to the law of God / and the faith of Israel."
Charge to the Couple
____________________________ and ___________________________ as
the two of you come into this marriage uniting you as husband and
wife, and as you this day affirm your faith and love for one another,
I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special
and unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and
suggestions of one another. Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges,
and live each day that you may share it together - as from this
day forward you shall be each other's home, comfort and refuge,
your marriage strengthened by your love and respect for each other.
(If a mixed marriage using acceptable components from multiple
ceremonies, this may be an appropriate charge to stress that strength
of faith of both - not surrender of faith by both - is where true
oneness and respect is found - for which this is an ALTERNATIVE
CHARGE TO COUPLES:
Just as two threads woven in opposite directions will form a most
beautiful tapestry, so too can your two lives merged together make
a beautiful marriage. To make your relationship work will take love.
This is the core of your marriage and why you are here today. It
will take trust, to know in your hearts that you truly want the
best for each other. It will take dedication, to stay open to one
another - and to learn and grow together. It will take faith, to
go forward together without knowing exactly what the future brings.
And it will take commitment, to hold true to the journey you both
pledge today to share together.
"Blessed out Thou O Lord God, who sanctifiest Thy people
Israel by the covenant of marriage.
In the presence of this company as witness, you have spoken the
words and preformed the rites which unit your loves. I therefore
declare __________ and _________ married not in accordances with
the laws of the State of ___________, but also married publicly
and before this company according to the rich traitions of the Jewish
faith.
Special Request for Bless
"Blessed be he that cometh in the name of the Lord.
O God, supremely blessed, supreme in might and glory, guide and
bless this bridegroom and bride.
Unto thee, O God and Father, we lift our souls in praise.
All of creation declares Thy glory; through man, fashioned in Thine
image, Thou hast revealed Thy majesty. Winthin the heart of all
people, Thou hast implanted the ennobling influences of love and
devotion. Thou Who art the Source of life and of joy, bless this
marriage and covenant which ________ and ___________ have sealed
in Thy name.
Be with them in this sacred hour, in all things of their marriage,
and in all the days to come.
Amen"
Silent Prayer
I ask you and all your dear ones to bow your heads in reverence.
Silently pray that God will bless the home of ______________ and
_____________ and that they each, and together, may achieve their
highest hopes.
(After short pause)
"May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make his
face shine upon you and be gracious unto you. May the Lord lift
up his countenance unto to you, and give you peace.
Amen")
Congratulations, you may kiss your bride!
(If the bottle is to be broken, it is done at this point - just
before kissing the bride. The best man places the bottle (usually
I light bulb well wrapped in a white cloth at the groom's feet.
It is appropriate for guests to applaud upon the breaking of the
bottle.)
It is my privilege to be the first to present Mr. _______________
and Mrs. _________________
(After the bridal party has exited, I will thank all in attendance
on behalf of the bride, groom and their families, make any reception
announces you wish, and then release the guests).
Jewish Traditional Breaking of the Bottle...
Below is one explanation I offer of the breaking of the bottle
in a wedding ceremony, which is placed immediately before declaring
the couple to be husband and wife:
"The breaking of the glass at the end of a wedding ceremony
serves to remind of two very important aspects of a marriage.
The bride and groom - and everyone - should consider these marriage
vows as an IRREVOCABLE ACT - just as permanent and final as the
breaking of this glass is unchangeable.
But the breaking of the glass also is a warning of the FRAILTY
of a marriage. That sometimes a single thoughtless act, breech of
trust, or infidelity can damage a marriage in ways that are very
difficult to undo - just as it would be so difficult to undo the
breaking of this glass.
Knowing that this marriage is permanent, the bride and groom should
strive to show each other the love and respect befitting their spouse
and love of their life."
(The bottle is usually a light bulb wrapped in a white towel. The
best man will place the bottle before the groom. However, it is
not broken at this point. Instead, the officiant continues to declare
the bride and groom to be "husband and wife". With "congratulations,
you may kiss your bride!" the groom then smashes the bottle
with his foot and kisses the bride. Applauding is appropriate in
most ceremonies with the breaking of the bottle.)
The Rose Ceremony
The Rose Ceremony may be added to any other ceremony
In the Rose Ceremony, the Bride and Groom give each other a Rose.
Two roses are all that is necessary. If you have children coming
into the ceremony, you may have a rose for each of them too - see
"Ways to Involve Children" Section. The Rose Ceremony
is placed at the end of the ceremony just before being pronounced
husband and wife.
In more elegant days, flowers were used as a means of communication.
Each Flower had a special meaning. In the old language of flowers,
a single red rose always meant "I love you". The Rose
ceremony gives recognition to the new and most honorable title of
"Husband and Wife".
This ceremony originates in a classic rose ceremony from a lost
and elegant age. Though the words of the classic Rose ceremony long
ago lost, this ceremony was rewritten by the Hon. Mark Ovard explaining
the true meaning of the ceremony - and in ways that can endure through
your married life together - this is a unique and meaningful addition
to any marriage ceremony - that also inspires your guests too.
Words of the Rose Ceremony
"Your gift to each other for your wedding today has been your
wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of
your vows of love and respect; and a public showing of your commitment
to each other.
You now have what remains the most honorable title which may exist
between a man and a woman - the title of "husband" and
"wife." For your first gift as husband and wife, that
gift will be a single rose.
In the past, the rose was considered a symbol of love and a single
rose always meant only one thing - it meant the words "I love
you." So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as husband
and wife - that gift would be a single rose.
Please exchange your first gift as husband and wife.
(Sometimes a couple will play a special song at this point).
In some ways it seems like you have not done anything at all. Just
a moment ago you were holding one small rose - and now you are holding
one small rose. In some ways, a marriage ceremony is like this.
In some ways, tomorrow is going to seem no different than yesterday.
But in fact today, just now, you both have given and received one
of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you
always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion
of marriage.
_________ and _____________, I would ask that where ever you make
your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home
- or a small and graceful one - that you both pick one very special
location for roses; so that on each anniversary of this truly wonderful
occasion you both may take a rose to that spot both as a recommitment
to your marriage - and a recommitment that THIS will be a marriage
based upon love.
In every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find
the right words.
It is easiest to hurt who we most love. It is easiest to be most
hurt by who we most love.
It might be difficult some time to words to say "I am sorry"
or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I
am hurting". If this should happen, if you simply can not find
these words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected
- for that rose than says what matters most of all and should overpower
all other things and all other words.
That rose says the words: "I still love you."
The other should accept this rose for the words which can not be
found, and remember the love and hope that you both share today.
__________ and ________, if there is anything you remember of this
marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here
today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it
is by love which your marriage shall endure."
BRIEF ELOPEMENT CEREMONY
(This it a brief elopement ceremony - shortest non religious ceremony
- only about 5 minutes - but still more meaningful than an courthouse
wedding.
You may add a PRAYER and/or Bible verse however if you wish a brief
Christian elopement ceremony- pick your own or from this material.
Or the Apache or Cherokee Blessing... or any other changed. You
are welcome to make any changes, deletions or additions to this
ceremony.)
___________ & __________, today you celebrate one of life's
greatest moments and give recognition to the worth and beauty of
love, as you join together in vows of marriage.
(Vows used unless other vows are wished. You may change the vows
as you wish)
(Groom) ___________________, do you take ________________ to he
your Wife? ("I do") Do you promise to love, honor, cherish
and protect her, forsaking all others and holding only unto her?("I
do")
(Bride_____________________ , do you take __________________ to
be your Husband? ("I do") Do you promise to love, honor,
cherish and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only unto
him? ("I do")
(If rings are exchanged each does so before repeating the following
vows - unless you wish other vows or do not wish to repeat vows.
It is not required to repeat vows.) Rings are NOT required)
(Groom),I _____________, take thee, ________________ to be my Wife-
To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for
poorer, and I promise my love to you. (With this ring, I thee wed.)
(Bride), I _________________ , take thee _______________, to be
my husband. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for
richer or for poorer, and I promise My love to you. (With this ring,
I thee wed.)
____________________________ and ___________________________, just
as two very different threads woven in opposite directions can form
a beautiful tapestry, so can your two lives merge together to form
a very beautiful marriage. To make your marriage work will take
love. Love should be the core of your marriage, love is the reason
you are here. But it also will take trust - to know in your hearts
you want the best for each other. It will take dedication - to stay
open to one another; to learn and to grow together even when this
is not always so easy to do. It will take faith - to always be willing
to go forward to tomorrow, never really knowing what tomorrow will
bring. And it will take commitment - to hold true to the journey
you both now pledge to share together.
(Some couples will add the "Standard Christian Ceremony Prayer"
to make this a Christian ceremony. This adds about 2 minutes. Others
add their favorite song, reading or poem at this point. Others will
add Unity Candles or the Rose Ceremony.)
________________________ and _________________________, in so much
as the two of you have agreed to live together in Matrimony, have
promised your love for each other by these vows, I now declare you
to be Husband and Wife.
Congratulations, you may kiss your bride.
Civil Wedding Ceremony
(This ceremony takes 8-15 minutes, depending upon whether you have
unity candles, Rose ceremony, other readings etc.
We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life's greatest
moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and
to add our best wishes to the words which shall unite_______________________
and ____________________________ in marriage.
Should there be anyone who has cause why this couple should not
be united in marriage, they must speak now or forever hold their
peace.
(If the bride is escorted forward)
Who is it that brings this woman to this man?
(The father, children, relative etc. may give the bride away. He/they
answer "I do", This person then steps back and the groom
takes the bride's hand.)
____________________and _______________________ , I would ask that
you both remember to treat yourself and each other with respect,
and remind yourself often of what brought you together today. Give
the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness and kindness
that your marriage deserves. When frustration and difficulty assail
your marriage - as they do to every relationship at one time or
another - focus on what still seems right between you, not only
the part that seems wrong. This way, when clouds of trouble hide
the sun in your lives and you lose sight of it for a moment, you
can remember that the sun is still there. And if each of you will
take responsibility for the quality of your life together, it will
be marked by abundance and delight.
VOWS
(Vows used unless other vows are wished. See Alternative vows.
You may change the vows as you wish or write your own.)
(Groom) ________________, do you take _______________ to he your
Wife? ("I do") Do you promise to love, honor, cherish
and protect her, forsaking all others and holding only unto her
forevermore?
("I do")
(Bride________________, do you take __________________ to be your
Husband? ("I do") Do you promise to love, honor, cherish
and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only unto him
forevermore?"(I do")
REPEATED VOWS
(If rings are exchanged each does so before repeating the following
vows - unless you wish other vows or do not wish to repeat vows.
It is not required that a couple exchange rings.)
(Groom) I _____________, take thee, ________________ to be my Wife-
To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for
poorer, in joy and sorrow and I promise my love to you.
If Rings are exchanged - ("With this ring, I take you as my
wife, for as long as we both shall live")
(Bride) I _________________, take thee ______________, to be my
Husband. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer
or for poorer, in joy and sorrow, and I promise My love to you.
If Rings are exchanged - ("With this ring, I take you as my
husband, for as long as we both shall live.")
(If there are children of either couple, sometimes couples will
give a ring or small gift such as a necklace or ring to the child
and say a short statement that they also are now part of the new
family. I believe it very important to mention children's names
in the ceremony, If you have minor children coming into the marriage,
please provide their names so I will mention them as is appropriate.)
____________________________ and ___________________________ as
the two of you come into this marriage uniting you as husband and
wife, and as you this day affirm your faith and love for one another,
I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special
and unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and
suggestions of one another. Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges,
and live each day that you may share it together - as from this
day forward you shall be each other's home, comfort and refuge,
your marriage strengthened by your love and respect for each other.
Just as two threads woven in opposite directions will form a most
beautiful tapestry, so too can your two lives merged together make
a beautiful marriage. To make your relationship work will take love.
This is the core of your marriage and why you are here today. It
will take trust, to know in your hearts that you truly want the
best for each other. It will take dedication, to stay open to one
another - and to learn and grow together. It will take faith, to
go forward together without knowing exactly what the future brings.
And it will take commitment, to hold true to the journey you both
pledge today to share together.
(If unity candles are used - optional. If the Rose Ceremony is
used, it is placed after the unity candle ceremony or in place of
it.)
UNITY CANDLE CEREMONY (this
is not required)
____________________ and _____________________, the two separate
candles symbolize your separate lives, separate families and separate
sets of friends. I ask that each of you take on of the lit candles
and that together you light the center candle.
The individual candles represent your lives before today. Lighting
the center candle represents that your two lives are now joined
to one light, and represents the joining together of your two families
and sets of friends to one.
(You can also involve children in the unity candle ceremony - click
here)
(For couples who are adding music to the ceremony, it is usually
placed either here or after the vows are repeated earlier.)
(THE ROSE CEREMONYMAY BE ADDED AT THIS POINT IF YOU WISH. This
beautiful addition is on this site.)
________________________ and _________________________, in so much
as the two of you have agreed to live together in Matrimony, have
promised your love for each other by these vows, the joining of
your hands and the giving of these rings, I now declare you to be
Husband and Wife.
Congratulations, you may kiss your bride.
It is my privilege to present to you Mr. & Mrs. _______________________________
(If a large gathering, after the wedding party has exited, I will
thank all for coming on your behalf and make any reception announcements
that you wish.)
CONTEMPORARY NON-RELIGIOUS
CEREMONY
(This is a contemporary, non religious ceremony. You may change
it anyway you wish or construct your own ceremony)
Opening Words
Good afternoon (morning/evening)! We are gathered here today, not
to witness the beginning of what will be, but rather what already
is! We do not create this marriage, because we cannot. We can and
do, however, celebrate with __________________ and ___________ and
their friends and families the wondrous and joyful occurrence that
has already taken place in their lives.
So let the ceremony begin!
The Celebration Of Marriage
Marriage is a supreme sharing of experience, and an adventure in
the most intimate of human relationships. It is the joyous union
of two people whose comradeship and mutual understanding have flowered
in romance. Today ___________ and__________ proclaim their love
and commitment to the world, and we gather here to rejoice, with
and for them, in the new life they now undertake together.
The joy we feel now is a solemn joy, because the act of marriage
has many consequences, both social and personal. Marriage requires
"love," a word we often use with vagueness and sentimentality.
We may assume that love is some rare and mystical event, when in
fact it is our natural state of being.
So what do we mean by love? When we love, we see things other people
do not see. We see beneath the surface, to the qualities which make
our beloved special and unique. To see with loving eyes, is to know
inner beauty. And to be loved is to be seen, and known, as we are
known to no other. One who loves us, gives us a unique gift: a piece
of ourselves, but a piece that only they could give us.
We who love, can look at each other's life and say, "I touched
his life," or, "I touched her life," just as an artist
might say, "I touched this canvas." "Those brushstrokes
in the comer of this magnificent mural, those are mine. I was a
part of this life, and it is a part of me." Marriage is to
belong to each other through a unique and diverse collaboration,
like two threads crossing in different directions, yet weaving one
tapestry together.
The secret of love and marriage is similar to that of religion
itself. It is the emergence of the larger self. It is the finding
of one's life by losing it. Such is the privilege of husband and
wife - to be each himself, herself and yet another; to face the
world strong, with the courage of two.
To make this relationship work, therefore, takes more than love.
It takes trust, to know in your hearts that you want only the best
for each other. It takes dedication, to stay open to one another,
to learn and grow, even when it is difficult to do so. And it takes
faith, to go forward together without knowing what the future holds
for you both. While love is our natural state of being, these other
qualities are not as easy to come by. They are not a destination,
but a journey.
The true art of married life is in this an inner spiritual journey.
It is a mutual enrichment, a give and take between two personalities,
a mingling of two endowments which diminishes neither, but enhances
both.
I would like to read to you a poem about this mingling, called
"Married Love," which was written by a medieval poet about
seven hundred years ago. In the English translation, it reads:
You and I
Have so much love,
That it burns like a fire,
In which we bake a lump of clay
Molded into a figure of you
And a figure of me.
Then we take both of them.
And break them into pieces,
And mix the pieces with water,
And mold again a figure of you And a figure of me.
I am in your clay.
You are in my clay.
In life we share a single quilt,
In death we will share one coffin.
As the poem shows us, mingling in marriage is a mutual dedication,
a cooperative venture in every sense. It is a relationship based
on love, respect, and a determination by both partners to adjust
to each other and support one another, in health and in sickness,
in joy and in sadness, in ease and in hardship.
(SOME COUPLES WILL REPLACE THE ABOVE "MARRIED LOVE" with
"THE PROPHET" - see Special ReadingsSection)
Through this co-operation, we give ourselves, our lives and love.
into the hands of the one we love. We do so trustingly and generously.
And so, each of us receives a gift: the life and love of the other.
We receive this gift, not only from the one we love, but also from
the parents who brought us into the world, and from our friends
and families as well.
And so as _______________ and _________________s friends and family,
we are here to share with them this joy and hope, and to see them
off on the path they will walk together. May it be a path of blessedness,
bright with flowers of prosperity and spiritual awakening; a path
of ever deepening, ever broadening love that they will travel, arm
in arm. through out eternity.
The Commitment
_______________ and _______________ this celebration is the outward
token of your sacred and inward union of hearts, which the church
and temple may bless, and the state make legal, but which neither
state nor church can create nor annul. It is a union created by
your loving purpose and kept by your abiding will. It is in this
spirit and for this purpose that you have come here to be joined
together.
VOWS
(You may pick other vows or write your own)
______________(Groom), will you have this woman to be thy wedded
wife, to live together in marriage? Will you love her, comfort her,
and honor her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy,
so long as you both shall live?
I Will!
_______________ (Bride) you take this man to be thy wedded husband,
to live together in marriage? Will you love him, comfort him. and
honor him, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, so long
as you both shall live?
I Will!
Ceremony of the Rings
Traditionally, the marking- of the passage to tile status of husband
and wife is marked by the exchange of rings. These rings are a symbol
of the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning
and no end, no giver and no receiver for each is the giver and each
is the receiver. May these rings always remind you of the vows you
have taken.
(Each places the ring on the other’s finger and repeats this
simple vow:)
"With this ring, I thee wed."
(Apache Blessing)
We will close with an Apache Blessing:
(Alternatively, you could use the Cherokee Prayer - Click here)
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be the shelter
for each other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be the warmth for
the other.
Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before.
Go now to your dwelling to enter into the days of your life together.
And may your days be good and long upon the earth.
________________ and _________________, remember to treat both
yourself and each other with respect, and remind yourselves often
of what brought you together.
Give the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness and kindness
that your connection deserves. When frustration, difficulty or fear
assail your relationship – as they threatened all relationships
at one time or another – remember to focus on what is right
between you, not only the part that seems wrong.
In this way, you can ride out the times when clouds hide the face
of the sun in your lives – remembering that even if you lose
sight of it for a moment, the sun is still there.
And if each of you takes responsibility for the quality of your
lives together, your life together will be marked by abundance and
delight.
(The Unity Candle and/or The Rose Ceremony may be added at this
point if you wish. Both are included on other sheets of the material
sent to you. You also may add the Cherokee Wedding Prayer - from
the "SPECIAL READINGS" section.
(You may also involve children in the unity candle ceremony - click
here)
PRONOUNCEMENT
Inasmuch as you have consented together in this ceremony to live
in wedlock and have sealed your vows in the presence of this company
and by the giving of these rings, it gives me great pleasure to
pronounce that you are Husband and Wife.
Congratulations, you make kiss!
(Recessional)
(I will make any announcements of reception, party or announcements
that you wish at the conclusion of the ceremony.)
ALTERNATIVE VOWS
( You may write any vows that you wish, use one of those below,
or the one in the ceremony you picked. Sometimes a couple will write
a short statement to say to each other in the ceremony. Remember,
a marriage is a promise that you make to each other so the vows
should reflect the commitment and promise you are making to each
other. You do not have to write your own vows if you do not wish
to and may simply use the vows already in the ceremony. Below are
the traditional vows of various denominations. The subtle distinction
between them are insightful and reflect the flavor of each denomination.)
BAPTIST VOWS:
"Will you, _______, have _____ to be your wife/husband? Will
you love her/him, comfort and keep her/him, and forsaking all other
remain true to him/her as long as you both shall live?"("I
will")
(Repeat)"I, ________, take thee ______, to be my wife/husband,
and before God and these witnesses I promise to be a faithful and
true wife/husband."
(Rings)"With this ring I thee wed, and all my worldly goods
I thee endow. In sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth,
'til death do us part."
CATHOLIC VOWS:
" _______, will you take _____ here present, for your lawful
wife/husband according to the rite of our Holy Mother, the Catholic
Church?"("I will")
(Repeat)"I, ________, take you ______, for my wife/husband,
to have an d to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do
us part."
(Rings)"With this ring I thee wed, and pledge thee my troth.."
LUTHERAN VOWS:
"_________, wilt thou have this woman/man to be thy wedded
wife/husband to live together after God’s ordinance in the
Holy Estate of matrimony? Wilt thou love her/him, comfort her/him,
honor and keep her/him as long as ye both shall live?" ("I
will")
(Repeat)"I, ________, take thee ______, to be my wife/husband,
and pledge thee my troth, so long as ye both shall live?"
(Rings)"Receive this ring as a token of wedded love and faith."
METHODIST VOWS:
"_________, wilt thou have this woman/man to be thy wedded
wife/husband to live together after God’s ordinance in the
Holy Estate of matrimony? Wilt thou love her/him, in sickness and
in health, and forsaking all others keep thee only unto her/him,
so long as ye both shall live?("I will")
(Repeat)"I, ________, take thee ______, to be my wife/husband,
to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better – for
worse, for richer – for poorer, in sickness and in health,
to love and to cherish, till death do us part, and thereto I pledge
thee my faith."
(Rings)"In token and pledge of the vow between us made, with
this ring I thee wed; in the name of the Father, and of the Son,
and of the Holy Spirit. Amen."
PRESBYTERIAN VOWS:
"_______, wilt thou have this woman/man to be thy wife/husband,
and wilt thou pledge thy faith to her/him, in all love and honor,
in all duty and service, in all faith and tenderness, to live with
her/hi, and cherish her/him, according to the ordinance of God,
in the holy bond of marriage?"("I will")
(Repeat)"I, ________, take thee ______, to be my wedded wife/husband,
and I do promise and covenant, before God and these witnesses, to
be thy loving and faithful wife/husband; in plenty and in want,
in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, as long as we both
shall live."
(Rings)"This ring I give thee, in token and pledge, of our
constant faith and abiding love."
EPISCOPAL VOWS:
"_______, wilt thou have this woman/man to be thy wedded wife/husband
to live together after God’s ordinance in the Holy Estate of
matrimony? Wilt thou love her/him? Comfort her/him, honor and keep
her/her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others keep
thee only unto him/her as long as you both shall live?"("I
will")
(Repeat)"I, ________, take thee ______, to be my wedding wife/husband,
to have an to hold from this day forward, for better for worse,
for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and
to cherish, 'til death do us part, according to God’s ordinance;
and thereto I pledge thee my troth."
(Rings)",With this ring I thee wed; in the name of the Father,
and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen."
JEWISH VOWS:
(Groom) Do you ____________, take _______ to be your wife? ("I
do"). Do you promise to love, cherish and protect her, whether
in good fortune or in adversity, and to seek with her a life hallowed
by the faith of Israel? ("I do")
(Bride) Do you ____________, take _______ to be your husband? ("I
do"). Do you promise to love, cherish and protect him, whether
in good fortune or in adversity, and to seek with him a life hallowed
by the faith of Israel? ("I do")
(Groom) __________ , as you place this ring upon the finger of
__________, speak to her these vows:
" With this ring/ be thou consecrated unto me/ as my wife/
according to the law of God / and the faith of Israel."
(Bride) __________ , as you place this ring upon the finger of
__________, speak to her these vows:
" With this ring/ be thou consecrated unto me/ as my wife/
according to the law of God / and the faith of Israel."
NON-DENOMINATIONAL
VOWS
Traditional:
"Do you, _______, take _______ to be your wife/husband? Do
you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect her/him, forsaking
all others and holding only unto her/him?"("I do")
(Repeat)"I ________, take thee ________, to be my wife/husband.
To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for
poorer, and I promise my love to you.."
(Ring)With this ring, I thee wed; all my love, I do thee give."
Contemporary:
"_______, do you come here freely and without reservation?("I
do")
(Repeat)"I _______, take you _______, to be my wife/husband.
To share the good times and hard times side by side as husband and
wife. I humbly give you my hand and my heart as a sanctuary of warmth
and peace, and pledge my faith and love to you."
(Rings) "Just as this circle is without end, my love for you
is eternal. Just as it is made of incorruptible substance, my commitment
to you will never fail. With this ring, I thee wed."
Festive Alternative:
(Repeat) "Before our friends and those so special to us here,
on this wonderful day of gladness and good fortune, I ______ take
you _______ as my wife/husband, in friendship and in love, in strength
and weakness, to share the good times and misfortune, in achievement
and failure, to celebrate life with you forevermore
( Ring) With this ring, I thee wed."
To Book Your Wedding or for Additional Information
Contact Rev. Mickey Dingott at:
1-(480) 948-4444
1-(602) 692-1747
E-mail:
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All Rights Reserved.
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Ceremonies